The Public Relations door swings open, and you enter a chamber with a water cooler and some bric-a-brac on the wall. The wallpaper is peeling, and condensation drips from the popcorn ceiling tiles. A heat lamp, nestled carelessly within the high-pile orange shag carpeting, glows eerily in the center of the room. A corkboard bulletin with Employee of the Year written above it shows the usual suspects: Charles Manson with a gold star for destroying the hippie movement, Tucker Carlson with special recognition for radicalizing the nation’s grandparents, and Taylor Swift with a gold star for general excellence.
Beside the water cooler, you spot an old refrigerator. You try the first two doors, marked NEW KINDS OF GUYS TO GET WORKED UP ABOUT and PINTEREST MIND CONTROL DEPARTMENT, but they are locked. Next to them is a door labeled ILLUMINATI ENTERTAINMENT DIVISION.